Hello I am Mommy Dearest

I’ve taken on a new job.  Of course I still do hair and makeup, those are my passions, but I have a bigger passion.  Being Mommy!  I got the wonderful chance to stay at home with my angel and I jumped at it.  We put him in Montessori School a few months ago, but he started getting sick all the time.  We know that’s normal, but each time he was sick I would have to stay home from work and after a while it just seemed ridiculous to call in all the time.  So I quit my job and decided to stay home to nurture and grow my angel full time.  

 

So far it’s been a few weeks, and it’s been wonderful.  He’s such a smart kid and it’s really nice to watch him explore and learn new things.  He’s very curious and cracks the biggest grin when he learns something new.  Potty training is going so well.  Each day I feel so blessed to be able to do this.  Years ago I thought I’d never be able to stay home and just be Mom.  Now that I’m here and I have this wonderful child with the most adorable smile, how could I be anywhere else?!  We have a new routine, and he’s very quickly become my best friend.  There’s a special bond between mom and son and I’m experiencing it right now.  My favorite part of the day is when he hugs me tight and says ‘Love you!’  No paycheck, award, or recognition even matches what that feels like.  

 

I can’t lie, I did hesitate a bit to begin with.  I told my husband that I felt uncomfortable not contributing.  He looked at me for a beat and shook his head.  ‘You are contributing the most, you’re raising our child.  Who else is better cut out to do this?’  This man is a gem.  Instantly I felt comforted.  He had faith in me, and that feeling is contagious.  He supports my dream and now my new role.  Everyday he gives me a new reason for why I feel so lucky to get to have a family with him.  It gives me pride in my new role.  

 

I feel so incredibly blessed.  

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Itsy Bitsy Snot

My poor little angel is fighting his first cold. Amazing isn’t it. We made it 18 months without any illness. I’m pretty sure he picked up something at school. He made it through his first week and came home with a cold. It didn’t hit him until Sunday and then all night he was screaming his head off because he couldn’t breathe. For those of you who haven’t dealt with this yet, here’s some advice. Aside from medicine, just pick your child up and rock or bounce them. It helps the mucous move. When they’re laying down it just collects and they get panicked because they can’t breathe. All they really want to do is cuddle anyway.

We gave him some benedryl to help with the congestion and just rocked him. He would softly ask for me to sing him Itsy Bitsy Spider. I would of course oblige. Not sure how a snot covered child sneezing and flinging boogers all over me is still so endearing. I couldn’t help but hold him and rock him, sing to him, and do everything in my power to make him comfortable. I rubbed Vick’s on his tiny chest and prayed with my whole heart that this passes quickly. We spent all night tending to him.

What an exhausting night. His first sick day. I see plenty of these coming now that he’s interacting with other children. Of course I feel horrible that he is so miserable, but I have to admit, all this extra cuddling is a bit of a positive for me. I can’t help it. I’m a cuddle-whore. I just love it. Someday he’ll turn to me and say “Mom, stop embarrassing me.” Until that time I will take every single moment of affection that I can-snot covered or otherwise. My lip muscles are quite adept, I’m able to fire off five kisses in rapid succession. He will not escape me!!

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Poops-a-daisy!

This morning something happened to me and it got my brain going. Let me first tell you about my morning so we can be on the same page:

I woke up and got ready as usual. My mother in law stays over on days I have to work so she was up giving my son his milk and keeping him company until I emerged from my room ready for work. While playing with my son I realize he’s pooped and needs to be changed so off we go. For those of you who are mothers of a mobile child, you know how much of a task it is to change a diaper. It’s that time period from when they begin to wiggle to right before they understand what the heck you’re saying that’s the hardest. So while my son is squirming I use my body to try to hold him still and boom…poop on my top. He does this new thing where he grabs his dirty diaper by the side flap and tries to pull it away. I’ve become proactive about this and grab that side of the diaper before he can get to it, but today he pulled a fast one on me and turned his body to squirm off the table. So long story short, I used my body to block him and got his butt right on the front of my top.

I immediately started thinking about which top in my closet would go with the rest of my outfit, since I was running low on time. Luckily I wear all black at the salon so replacing the top wasn’t a huge deal. And that’s when it hit me. At what point did I become so comfortable with feces on my shirt that I didn’t even think about that and just thought, OK I have to change my top, which one will it be?

Being a mother changes everything. It’s not the same changes for everyone, but change for certain. I find that I’m even more laid back than I already was. I was always accepting of things that happened in my life, but now it’s a whole new level. My son brings all sorts of adventures to my days and I’m proud to say I take it all in stride. Even during his tantrums and melt downs I find that my mind is a peaceful ocean and I’m just trying to figure out what his issue is and how to resolve it. Very seldom do I get frustrated, I’ve reached a level of understanding that allows everything to make complete sense to me.

I have my mother and my grandfather to thank for this. I can only remember calm reactions from them. . My mom is always understanding anytime anything happens. She would explain very thoroughly why something was happening. Not a drip of panic from her, ever. My grandfather was the same way. He was so accepting of people and their personalities. Even if someone was unreasonable and just awful, he would accept that part of them because he understood their story. He would tell me since I was a child, that people don’t change, and so if you can’t change something you must learn to accept it. These lessons have saved me so much heartache. I don’t take things so personally because I realize that people are different and in order to live peacefully I just have to let go and accept. Of course I’m human, and things hurt my feelings from time to time, but you’ll find no grudges in my heart. At the same time I am able to recognize when people are just toxic and need to be ignored. One of the most important lessons I learned from my family was forgiveness. Being surrounded by these calm personalities helped shape me into the person I am today. I hope to create that same environment for my son. (I should add in here that “calm” isn’t how most people would describe my family because we’re loud and outspoken, but I don’t mean it in that context. I mean the calmness that’s in their hearts.)

Nurturing a new life is hard work, and although your baby isn’t always going to be dependent, the challenges change and take new form. It’s important to keep a clear mind and analyze the situation and find your solution. Baby fell and scraped his knee, that’s fine, let’s go clean it up and get a cool band aid on it. Baby is teething and has turned into a monster, ok let’s cuddle and put this oragel on your gums. Got poop on your shirt, change it. Got pee in the mouth, don’t worry it’s sterile. What I mean is, there’s no use in worrying about what has already happened, just find your solution, there’s bound to be one!

New mothers and fathers, I was in your shoes just over a year ago. I’m familiar with the overwhelming feeling you get just before baby shows up. You know when you start to realize just what it is exactly that you got yourself into. Raising a human being, in charge of a life, teaching…the job duties go on and on. Take it easy and a day at a time. You don’t have to have it all figured out right away, just do your best in the moment.

Getting poop on my shirt and not batting an eye shows me my perspective has changed. 10 years ago I probably would have squealed “Ewwwwww!” and ran for my life. But you know, when you’re a mother, you get drooled on, cried on, peed on, pooped on, bled on, pretty much every bodily fluid will spend some time on you. That’s life. It’s the role I chose and I love every stinkin’ minute of it.

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